The Daily SGM Paper - CORRUPTION AND TYRANNY - 9/12/20

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by gerafe, Sep 12, 2020.

  1. gerafe

    gerafe Member

    The Tragic Story of @tz-

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    Teezy, one of our nicest resident players and one of the most wholesome people I know, has been executed by the mods in front of our eyes. Our story starts further back than that though.

    Last night, on the Eastern server, a shaman was found performing rituals on the top of canyon with the barrels. Player Juice Master attempted to interrupt this ritual with his own, bringing a barrel up to the top and attempting to slam it through the shaman's head. The shaman, being experienced with heathens of this sort, wrapped his barrel around him and they flew off the edge together locked in each others arm's. They became barrel-crossed lovers.

    Who was the shaman, and what ritual was he performing? I did some digging and found the shaman to be none other than @tz- . He was performing a ritual to make sure we all have a very nice day as he is a very nice man. However, as we all know here at SGM, the moderators are not too keen on us having nice days.

    On a staff report where @tz- gave his simple opinion, one that was only eight words, he was brutally executed in private with zero hesitation. The mods dragged him away and cut off his head, silencing him for his dissenting opinion. His words are as follows:

    "youre lying i have been banned for less"

    We at SGM Daily do not stand for such tyranny and fascism among the forum moderators. In fact, there is zero accountability among the mods. Where can we, as private citizens, see information as to who executed @tz- or what he was actually executed for? Where was @tz- judged and tried by a group of his peers? Where can we as citizens of this community see our own warning points or know when we will inevitably be banned?

    The answer too all of that is we cannot. The moderators have taken every step to avoid accountability, hiding those who ban others on the forums. They hide behind their powers knowing they can take advantage of us. Today, this is the only main headline as any others will be a distraction that the mods are begging for. We as a people must stand up against this or we will all be Mr. Teezy.

    Birthdays
    Today is @Frost 's birthday

    Eulogy
    bug55bunny blew off a c4 in spawn playing c4 roulette. He killed half the server resulting in a multitude of reports and a four week vacation.

    YubiYubi, our favorite server sweetheart, honorably planted a c4 as an innocent killing four innocents and earning a karma ban. The entire server decided to hop to TTT West from East in order to keep playing with Yubi.

    @DIO THE THOTSLAYER planted a huge c4 in a game of roulette on Roy the Ship. Although Dio was smart, he jumped ship and swam to Africa for a vacation until Roy the Ship parks and we go to a new map. But, Dio was not as smart as we thought, he accidentally rejoined the ship before we landed and he was subsequently executed. His last words were:

    "I have come back."

    Ratings
    @Roy : SGM newspaper 10/10
    @MetalCrysis : im illiterate, but reading the sgm paper, allows me to read beyond human comprehension
    @Highwon : this man is going to take down this server, but his newspaper is so good!
     
    • Winner x 8
    • Like x 5
    • Funny x 1
    • Informative x 1
    • Creative x 1
  2. 10/10 cant wait for the next one
     
  3. Frost

    Frost Frosted Pun King Moderator VIP

    Sounds like an ideal vacation after bombing half the server

    I rate this article 20/10

    Approved by the #CyanidesFactCheckerOrganization
     
  4. Orion

    Orion H.U.G.E. Champion 2057 VIP

    You have commited a crime against humanity by lying like this.

    snack hole is more important than anything in any edition, past or future.

    I'll see you in court, Judge @Lordyhgm will be overseeing the trial. Good luck. You're gonna need it.

    No more Mr. Nice Guy for you.
     
  5. gerafe

    gerafe Member

    greater concerns came up, i am not worried about @Lordyhgm . Admins and moderators have no power over the free press
     
  6. Orion

    Orion H.U.G.E. Champion 2057 VIP

    I don't know if you realized, but I'm suing your "free press".

    More like biased press. You promised me snack hole and I didn't get snack hole.
     
    • Disagree Disagree x 1
    • Informative Informative x 1
  7. Night

    Night VIP

    Now I know how corrupted this server is! 10/10
     
    • Agree Agree x 1
  8. No (excuse my obscenities) frickin way, this incredible journalism has even gotten the attention of the owner! Truly a remarkable journalist, señor gerfie
     
    • Friendly Friendly x 1
  9. Dodley27

    Dodley27 Dolfin VIP Bronze

    Free tz
     
    • Winner Winner x 1
  10. Bag of Chips

    Bag of Chips New Member

    This is the best news I read this nice beautiful day. 10/10 will continue reading
     
    • Agree Agree x 1
  11. gerafe

    gerafe Member

    NO SNACK HOLE
     
    • Dislike Dislike x 1
  12. Spooky Adult

    Spooky Adult Now you just somebody that I used to know VIP Silver

    Rip tz
     
    • Friendly Friendly x 1
  13. Lovisa

    Lovisa aërf (⁄ ⁄◕⁄‿⁄◕⁄ ⁄✿) Moderator VIP

    I Look forward to this every day
     
    • Agree Agree x 1
  14. Desert

    Desert Nein! Nein! Nein! VIP

    Stop, I can only get so hard.
     
    • Winner Winner x 1
  15. Tybe

    Tybe Moderator VIP

    Can confirm, not allowed to have nice days. Sorry not sorry.
     
    • Dislike Dislike x 1
  16. RIP TZ
     
    • Agree Agree x 1
  17. jshore

    jshore VIP

    literally have no clue what happened but I know tz didn't do anything wrong
     
    • Agree Agree x 2
  18. DragonFire

    DragonFire Member

    my hope in life is to get in the news one day for mass rdm