A boy and his dad are talking "Hey Dad." "Yes son?" "Did you ever get shot in the army?" He looks at his son in silence. Tears start to form in the Dad's eyes, and he quietly replies; "No, but I was shot in the leggy." EDIT: Since I already got Elite, ill be enterin for @Alin.
I'm really happy for you glad you are getting well now. If i win somehow,i'd like to have just vip here's a dirty one: "I asked my grandma if she had ever tried 69. She said, "No, but I have done 53 -- that's all the people I could screw in one night."
I've got some offensive ones if anyone likes dark humour.. Spoiler: Warning: Offensive Content What was the Jew doing in the Ashtray? Family Research. What's the difference between Al Qaeda base and a Pakistani School? I don't know, I just fly the drones. Why are Pills White? Because they work. What do you do after you've finished raping a blind, mute and deaf person? Break her fingers so she can't tell anyone.
Rig for meh A girl and and a boy are having an arguement Chick: you're a fucking cock and you know that
My friend told me this one a few days ago and I had to find it; A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. While he sits there he notices a jar full of money on the bar. Next to the jar is a sign that reads, "complete the challenge win the prize." Curious, the guy asks the bartender about the challenge. The bartender explains there are three parts that must be completed. First: Down a gallon of tequila straight in under five minutes. Second: An alligator out back has a terrible tooth and ache and the tooth has to be pulled. Third: Have sex with the dirtiest hooker in the place. The guy thinks it over and he accepts the challenge. He downs the tequila in no time. Then he staggers out back and everyone in the bar hears an awful commotion. Then silence. The guy stumbles back in the door his clothes torn to sheds. He yells, "Now! Where's that hooker with the tooth ache?"
Why couldn't the 11 year old get into the pirate movie? It was rated Spoiler: please don't hurt me ARRRGH
